


Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me

by irisirene



Category: The Doctor Blake Mysteries
Genre: Explicit Sexual Content, First Time, M/M, Period-Typical Homophobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-31
Updated: 2017-05-31
Packaged: 2018-11-07 03:14:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11050131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/irisirene/pseuds/irisirene
Summary: Matthew Lawson constantly surprises Charlie Davis, in ways that he never could have imagined.





	Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me

**Author's Note:**

> Fic title comes from the 60's love song: "Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me" by: Mel Carter (I am incapable of naming a fic without using a song title, to be honest)  
> _________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________  
> Disclaimer: The Doctor Blake Mysteries and all characters and settings belong to the ABC and the BBC, not to me. No Copyright Infringement intended. All mistakes, however, are mine and I welcome any all constructive criticisms, particularly anything relating to spelling or grammar issues. I warn you, I haven't written anything explicit in a /very/ long time so if the sex scenes seem off, that's why!

If there was something that Charlie Davis could always expect Matthew Lawson to do, it was to surprise him. Since they’d met, Charlie had been met with surprise after surprise, until he’d eventually realized that there were many, many layers to Matthew, the man was far more complex than he’d ever realized—not that nearly everyone didn't make the same mistake when it came to his boss.

For instance, Charlie never would have guessed that Lawson had been bullied for years during his childhood, nor would he have ever in a single instant have imagined that Matthew was…queer. His own inclinations seemed terribly obvious compared to Matthew’s; what with the way that Matthew reacted to any and all mention of homosexuality—whether it was between two women or two men. That disgust had led Charlie to be even more vigilant about hiding his latent attraction to the Chief Superintendent.

He often worried about his gaze lingering too long, regardless of how carefully he always schooled his expression—making certain that he wasn’t exhibiting any signs of the adoration that he’d slowly grown to possess for Lawson. Charlie made sure to be as professional as possible around Lawson, even as the trust they’d gradually began to develop grew more as his reports to Melbourne grew practically nonexistent. It had been slow going, Lawson wasn’t quick to trust—especially not when the Brass saw fit to send him a spy in the form of a constable. However, as his reports started to contain less and less important information regarding the goings on of the Ballarat police station, Matthew had slowly started to warm to his presence, in the sense that Charlie was little more than a slight aggravation at times. One night, however, things started to change much more rapidly.

After wrapping up a particularly rough case, Charlie found himself lingering at the Station well past dark, until he and Lawson were the only ones still present. That within and of itself wasn’t unusual, Charlie often found himself working late, but usually there were at least a couple of other people still milling about, putting evidence away or checking on people down in the cells if there were any. Charlie was so absorbed in his own thoughts that he hadn’t even noticed that they were the only two left. He’d just been sitting there at his desk, staring off into space, for quite some time. His reports had already been turned in, in triplicate, his desk organized, and the daily washing up of all of the Stations cups and mugs, but he hadn’t feel ready to leave yet, not ready to go back to the bloody boarding house and his roommate’s drunken snoring. He hadn’t even noticed that Lawson himself had finished his own reports and was carefully leveling a confused gaze his way, not until the man was standing before him, already wearing his overcoat.

When Charlie’s distant blue eyes blinked up at Lawson, the older man reached out to lay an awkward hand on his shoulder, offering him an upward twitch of his lips—a hint of a smile, just for him. The little gestures made Charlie’s stomach tingle oddly in that way he’d come to associate with being around Matthew Lawson, stronger now in the face of awkwardly offered affection than they’d ever been before.

“C’mon. You look like a man who could use a drink,” Lawson remarked, his tiny smile growing infinitesimally as Charlie rose out of his stupor and scrambled to put on his own overcoat. Clapping Charlie on the shoulder again, Lawson led the way out of the Station, shutting lights off as they went and locking the doors behind them. Unable to quite believe his luck, Charlie stayed silent as Lawson led them to his car and drove them to his home, not the pub or even the club. Throughout the short drive, Lawson occasionally looked over at him, seemingly trying to assess him or his mood. A handful of times, their eyes met when Matthew looked over, only for them both to look away hastily.

Neither of them spoke as Lawson pulled into his drive and killed the engine, nor when either of them unbuckled their lap belts and slid out of the car. Charlie followed the older man up to the house, lingering a few steps behind out of both respect and trepidation. Resisting the urge to fidget, Charlie stood to the side on Lawson’s porch as he waited for him to unlock and open the door, before shyly following Lawson inside when the man held it open for him. They paused just long enough to remove their coats and hang them up on the pegs behind Matthew’s door, before Matthew headed down the hall to turn on the light.

Unable to help himself, Charlie gave the front hall and living a curious once-over, taking in the furniture and the house’s layout, as well as the few personal items and decorations that were visible. Matthew was such an enigma at times that it was frankly fascinating to have some sort of view into his life. Of course, Matthew noticed Charlie’s not-so-subtle curiosity with no small amount of humour, making his way over to the sideboard. He removed a decanter filled with whiskey and two cut crystal glasses, raising them up to the light first to make sure that they weren’t dusty from disuse, before setting them on top of the sideboard. The clink of the glasses brought Charlie back to the present, a faint flush forming on his face as Lawson handed him a glass with a generous portion of whiskey, with a knowing look.

“Thanks,” Charlie offered weakly, unsure of how exactly to respond to the situation at large. His confusion only increased when his apparent nervousness only made Lawson’s expression go inexplicably soft, the man’s sharp edges softening in a way that Charlie was unaccustomed to having pointed at him, not some grieving victim in need of sympathy.

When Lawson grabbed his own drink and gestured toward the sofa, Charlie sat stiffly, automatically raising his glass to his lips and sipping at the strong liquor as he watched Lawson sit in the arm chair directly across from the sofa. They lapsed into silence once more for several moments, the room completely quiet but for their breathing and the sound of the occasional rustle of branches in the cold wind outside.

Moments later, Lawson released a quiet sigh, reaching up with his spare hand to remove his hat and set it to the side on the coffee table, before loosening his tie—drawing Charlie’s attention in the process. A strange energy seemed to fill the room as their eyes met again, an unidentifiable expression on Lawson’s face causing Charlie’s heart to race. His blood starting to become audible to his own ears, he found himself unwilling to break their gaze. Lawson finally looked away, looking vaguely uncomfortable and nodding to himself. Overcome by the increasing tension in the room, both men drained their drinks with much more speed and less care than either would normally have taken with such an expensive bottle of scotch. Wordlessly, Lawson rose once again and held out his hand for Charlie’s empty glass, before taking it over to the sideboard and refilling their glasses once more.

Once their glasses had been refilled, Lawson handed Charlie back his glass and resumed his spot in the chair, a certain uneasiness to his movements only serving to make Charlie more nervous.

Glancing at Charlie again, this time somewhat apprehensively, Lawson sat back further in his chair, cradling his drink in both hands before raising his glass to his lips. Gathering his courage, he drained the second glass even more quickly than he had the first, carelessly downing the expensive single malt with the care of a teenager stealing sips from a liquor cabinet and prompting Charlie to follow suit. The liquor burning its way down his throat to his stomach, Charlie merely sat there, sensing somehow that Matthew was building up to something; something significant that seemed to take a lot of effort for the man to express. His concerned patience finally paid off when Matthew sighed again, before reaching over to place his empty glass on the coffee table, uncaring of the ring that might be left in its wake. Charlie did the same, watching his movements, searching for some clue that might help him better understand the situation.

No possible clue could have prepared him for when Lawson did finally decide to address the unacknowledged tension that had steadily been growing since they’d walked in the door. One second, they were just sitting there, trading short awkward glances and the next, Matthew was shifting forwards, reaching out with his hand to place an unsteady, if solid, hand on Charlie’s knee.

Stunned, Charlie’s breath caught as his eyes darted down to Matthew’s hand and back up to Matthew’s face, his brain trying to make sense of the gesture, whether it was just an innocent gesture intended to offer comfort—after all, Matthew’s hand wasn’t high up on his leg, heading to his thigh or anything—but, there was Matthew’s strange nervousness and the fact that Charlie was reasonably sure that Matthew’s hand was _trembling_ where it rested on his knee. Realization dawned on Charlie as he finally came to a conclusion, his findings confirmed by the presence of an almost imperceptible flush riding high on Matthew’s prominent cheekbones.

“I’m not wrong, am I?,” Lawson asked quietly, as if speaking too loudly would spook them both and send either of them running. When Charlie’s eyebrow rose quizzically, Matthew cleared his throat anxiously before gingerly squeezing Charlie’s knee, his shaking hand moving slowly upwards, enough that Charlie had to fight the urge to tense. Sudden terror bubbled up inside Charlie, when confronted with the fact that reality was starting to play out like his fantasies. Blinking rapidly, he tried to puzzle out how exactly he should respond.

“No,” Charlie croaked, his mind desperately trying to remind his heart that this was rapidly heading into dangerous territory, that revealing himself could easily lead to trouble.

However, Charlie knew instantly that he’d said the wrong thing, when Matthew’s features contorted in panic like Charlie had never before witnessed, his wonderfully warm hand departing from his leg as quickly as it could be pulled away. Matthew’s face was turning alarmingly red in record time, his eyes wide and worried, absolutely horrified. Immediately, Charlie reached out to grab Lawson’s retreating hand, pressing it back to his knee, with as soft as a look as he could manage. “I-I meant; no, you haven’t gotten it wrong,” Charlie confessed, his voice scarcely more than a whisper, unable to witness a single second more of Matthew’s anguish. “Any of it,” Charlie added, his tone markedly deeper, surer, as Matthew’s expression slowly evened out of its terrified grimace.

As Charlie’s words gradually began to sink in, Matthew relaxed a fraction, the panic slowly bleeding out of him, his face growing less pinched, and his posture losing some of its rigidity. Matthew drew in a shaky breath and briefly glanced away, licking at his lips unconsciously, a nervous tic that Charlie wouldn’t have thought that Lawson would fall victim to.

“I haven’t…,” Matthew began uncomfortably, gesturing as if his hands could somehow complete the sentence for him. When it didn’t, he blinked rapidly several times, reaching up to run a hand down his face. “I haven’t…Y’know… _been_ with a bloke,” he confided, his face flushing a deep pink once more, a much more pleasing flush this time around, one not borne of utter terror but of embarrassment. Frankly, it was a bit cute.

The uncomfortable confession stirred something in Charlie’s chest, making him offer Matthew’s hand a sympathetic squeeze. The look that Matthew favoured him afterward roused that tenderness further. There was undisguised longing written all over Matthew’s face, even if his anxiety was still apparent. Pointedly, Charlie glanced down at the older man’s mouth, before looking back up at Matthew’s blue eyes, trying to telegraph his intent in advance, before making any sort of move, on the chance that Matthew might spook and change his mind when presented with a concrete gesture. Lawson cottoned on to his intent fairly quickly, the implication of that glance sending him reeling.

Breathing in quick, shallow spurts, Matthew rose from his chair and took the few steps over to the couch, moving to sit next to Charlie. Upon noticing that Matthew had still left a respectable amount of distance between them, Charlie smiled softly, his expressive eyes practically radiating affection as he turned his entire body to face Matthew. He reached out and laid a hand on Matthew’s elbow, reassuringly. “I will never do anything that you don’t want me to,” he vowed. The sincerity reached Matthew, who sagged a bit at the confirmation that Charlie couldn’t push him anywhere that he didn’t care to go, regardless of what they might become to one another, regardless of the information that Charlie had on him.

Nodding resolutely in unvoiced reply, Matthew turned toward Charlie, their knees bumping together as he also elected to turn bodily as opposed to moving his head, before leaning forward tentatively, obviously searching for a kiss. Smiling, Charlie leaned forward further, moving slowly enough that Matthew would have plenty of time to back away if he changed his mind, gently pressing his lips to the other man’s. It was just a tender brush of lips, at first, before Matthew inhaled sharply and reached out to grasp the front of Charlie’s uniform and tugged him closer. Easily, Charlie scooted closer, pressing his lips more firmly against Lawson’s, letting more of his pent-up passion into the kiss, his hands coming up to tilt Matthew’s face to a better angle and then lingering there.

Soon, they were snogging in earnest, their bodies turning towards each other and coming together, Charlie nearly winding up in Matthew’s lap as the older man kept pulling him closer, strong arms coming up to wrap around Charlie’s back and hold him in place. By the time they pulled away to catch their breath properly, they were disheveled and panting, faces and ears flushed, pupils dilated. Charlie’s eyes roamed over the sight of a freshly kissed Matthew, greedily taking in his flushed beauty and the desire written all over it. Huffing out of a breath of laughter, Charlie untangled his hand from Matthew’s blond hair, gently smoothing the disarrayed strands with a genuine smile. He received a nervous smile in return, Matthew’s arms slowly relaxing from their iron tightness to a gentle hold before falling away from Charlie entirely. Uncertainty bloomed on Matthew’s face again before he licked his lips and rose from the sofa, shakily making his way out the hall, leaving a pleasure-dazed Charlie behind.

After a minute, Charlie concluded that he was meant to follow and did, pausing only long enough to figure out which room in the hall was Matthew’s bedroom—the light filtering into the hall clued him in fairly quickly, though he took his time in reaching it, trying to give Matthew a moment to adjust. When he finally found himself standing in the doorway, Charlie looked in and his breath caught, his blood immediately beginning to rush downwards as the implications of what Matthew was doing reached him.

Matthew was standing just before the bed, unbuttoning his blue button up shirt, having already undone his uniform jacket and tie and tossed them into the chair by his dresser. His mouth going dry with arousal, Charlie tossed his hat on top of Matthew’s clothes before approaching Matthew, gingerly pressing up against his back. Matthew’s hand stilled and he leaned backwards into Charlie’s warmth, closing his eyes and tilting his head to the side the instant that Charlie placed a kiss there.

A few moments passed by with them simply standing there, enjoying the intimacy of being pressed together, of being near to each other, before Matthew turned in Charlie’s hold, pressing his front against Charlie, this time. He initiated this kiss, leaning forward and capturing Charlie’s lips, their passion igniting almost immediately. This time the angle was better, their similar heights making it easy for their bodies to slot together, both men gasping as their growing arousals met through the thick fabric of their uniform trousers. Matthew’s hands grew exploratory, much to Charlie’s delight, roaming over Charlie’s chest and sides before resting on his hips, avoiding going anywhere near his backside. Charlie returned the favour, his own hands roaming over the length of Matthew’s back, gripping at his broad shoulders in his ardor.

Their clothes soon began to become cumbersome to wandering, hungry hands, Matthew boldly moving to undo the belt on Charlie’s uniform, slipping it loose from the buckle so that he could reach the buttons holding the jacket together, before pushing the jacket from Charlie’s arms. Charlie let it fall behind him, not caring for the where the garment landed, too eager to get back to what they were doing. Matthew’s lips curled up in a genuine smile at the action, as he moved on to Charlie’s tie, and then the young man’s shirt.

Once they were on more even footing, clothing-wise, Charlie’s hands went to Matthew’s shirt, finishing the job that he’d started earlier, leaving them both clad only in their singlets from the waist up. Charlie leaned in to press another kiss to Matthew’s lips, their passion reigniting almost immediately, causing the rest of their clothes to come off in a blur. When they parted again, they were standing before each other completely naked, shyly taking in the sight of each other in the dim lighting of Matthew’s bedside lamp.

“You’re beautiful,” Charlie breathed before he could stop himself, instantly worrying about the implication that Matthew might draw from the words. He needn’t have, as Matthew chuckled with good grace, rolling his eyes affectionately. The flush that had been staining Matthew’s prominent cheeks had traveled all the way down his neck, to his sparsely haired chest and Charlie couldn’t resist the urge to reach out and follow the path with his long fingers,  his eyes daring to dip low enough to see what Matthew’s cock looked  like. He blushed deeper himself when he found that it more than met his expectations, rising proud from Matthew’s greying pubic and straining toward him. His gaze travelled back upwards almost immediately, meeting Matthew’s amused gaze.

“Meet with your approval?,” Matthew asked, humour tinging his tone, before he stepped away and headed for the bed. Hesitating a brief moment, he turned down the covers and then twisted back to look at Charlie, seeking the reassurance of his gaze.  Charlie offered it easily, his hands twitching towards his groin when he caught Matthew’s eyes dipping downwards, barely managing to thwart the action in time to allow Matthew a good eyeful. The young man’s body was fit, with strong legs framing his pelvis and a length that Matthew couldn’t help but think suited Charlie’s body perfect. It must have been obvious on his face, given the expression that Charlie soon adopted. Grinning, Charlie then moved to the other side of the bed, turning the covers down on his side and then slipping into bed when Matthew did.

They settled down next to each other and then moved closer, Matthew leaning back so that Charlie could lie on his elbow and lean over his chest for another kiss. As their bodies aligned together, Charlie’s arousal pressing into his hip and his own pressing into Charlie’s thigh when the young man shifted so that their legs were entangled. Their kissing took on a whole new level as they rocked into each other, the friction making them grow desperate as time went on, releasing gasps and grunts as the stimulation grew. That is, until Matthew brought things to stop by placing his hands on Charlie’s shoulders and gently pushing him away.

“Wait,” Matthew gasped out, breathing heavily and looking away. Swallowing hard, he braced himself for the request he was about to make, unable to help thinking about what it would say about him that he wanted _that_ of all things. Charlie caught his own breath and disentangled their legs so that he could sit up and regard Lawson thoughtfully. Matthew was clearly uncomfortable and Charlie was starting to wonder if he would want to stop, but before he could say anything about it, Matthew spoke again. “I want,” he began, only to break off again, embarrassment winning over desire. In an effort to make himself understood without speaking, without having to ask for the one thing he’d sworn to himself that he’d never, Lawson turned over to reach into his bedside table and tossed a tin of Vaseline at Charlie.

Thanks to his reasonably quick reflexes, Charlie managed to catch it with a confused expression, just figuring out what it was when he turned the tin over in his hands. Surprised, he went to search Matthew’s expression for explanation, only to find that Matthew had turned over onto his stomach, baring his backside. Charlie’s arousal twitched at the very suggestion that Matthew wanted _him_ to be the one, er, giving. “I,” he started, unsure of how to ask without offending Lawson if he was wrong. At his aborted question, Matthew turned his head, craning his neck to do so, a frustrated expression pulling his brows together.

“You know what I’m asking,” he stated, somewhat sharply, his shoulders turning pink with the additional embarrassment, leaving most of his top half an attractive shade of pink. Matthew turned back around again, resting his head on the pillow, tensing as he waited for Charlie to touch him.

Warmth overcame him again at the tension and embarrassment wafting off of Matthew, leading Charlie to set the tin on the bed for a moment and reach out for the man again. The long lean line of Matthew’s naked body was so beautiful, he thought, as he reached out to run his hands along his back, soothing him as one might a startled horse. Tenderly, Charlie began to kiss along the back of Matthew’s neck, alternating the warmth of his tongue with the sharpness of little love bites, being careful not to leave any marks that a single man like Matthew wouldn’t be able to easily explain away. Within a few moments, Matthew was relaxing into the bed and shivering with pleasure, prompting Charlie to move further downwards, trailing kisses and bites along Matthew’s shoulder blades as he reached for the tin and popped it open.

The sound made Lawson shiver harder with the knowledge of what Charlie was about to do, which only heightened Charlie’s own arousal, making the young man fight for control over it as he dipped his fingers into the tin and collected a fair amount of petroleum jelly on his fingertips. Licking his dry lips, Charlie took a deep breath and reached for Matthew’s arse, his dry hand gently rubbing at his cheeks before parting them. Naturally, Matthew tensed the moment his fingers stroked over his hole, so he paused, waiting for him to relax. Embarrassed by both his desire to be buggered and his fear over it, Matthew forced himself to relax, trying to distract himself by just focusing on the sensations and not thinking about anything else at all.

It was easier than he might have expected, especially as Charlie rubbed at that spot behind his balls that made Matthew spread his legs wider, before the younger man returned to his arse and teased at it with a fingertip, gently opening him up. However, Matthew hadn’t expected more than a cursory swipe with the jelly to ease the way, so he jumped when Charlie slipped one of those beautifully long fingers slipped inside. “Oi!,” he gasped, whipping his head around, his expression clearly asking Charlie what the bloody Hell he thought he was doing.

“I’m not going to hurt you,” Charlie replied, his finger stilling inside Matthew, not removing it but not pushing it in any further. Matthew, somewhat mollified, laid back down, trying to focus on his flagging arousal. Once Charlie had the go-ahead, he continued on with his ministrations, gently stretching Matthew and making sure that the Vaseline was coating him well enough not to drag against Matthew’s insides in a way that would be unpleasant. After a few moments, Charlie was able to insert another finger, and therefore, get an angle to rub his fingers against Matthew’s prostate. As he rubbed at it, Matthew tensed below him again, before shifting back against him, pressing back onto his fingers.

“Bloody Hell!,” Matthew exhaled, feeling his flagging erection spring back to full hardness in a near instant, Charlie’s fingers reaching something deep inside him that he’d never had been aware of. Charlie smiled to himself at the way Matthew ground back down onto his fingers, loosening up around his fingers as his body became focused on nothing but the pleasure Charlie was greedily offering up. When Charlie withdrew his fingers, Matthew’s body tried to follow him instinctively, until Matthew realized what he was doing.

His own hands shaking in anticipation, Charlie reached for the Vaseline once more, coating his fingers before running them along his cock, his eyes slipping closed as he fought to ignore the way his slick hand felt around his arousal. His hand slipped downwards to guide his erection as he pressed against Matthew’s back, gingerly thrusting inside Matthew and pressing further in slowly with a shaky exhale. Matthew gasped beneath him, tensing for a moment as Charlie pulled him back against his front, their bodies pressing against each other as Charlie settled inside him, from shoulders to feet.

Lying completely still, Charlie went back to kissing Lawson’s neck, nuzzling at his hairline as Lawson’s body opened around him. As soon as Charlie felt he was ready, he began to gently rock their bodies together and apart, his hand slipping from where it had been guiding Matthew’s hip to wrap around Matthew’s hard cock. Matthew’s breath caught, audibly, and he tightened around Charlie’s erection in a way that made them both moan. Aiming carefully, and with a few off-centre thrusts, Charlie managed to hit his lover’s prostate, causing Matthew to gasp out a muffled “Bloody Hell!” into his pillow. Fortunately, his aim remained true as he continued to thrust deeply into Matthew, his hand struggling to keep in rhythm as they both climbed higher toward ecstasy.

Charlie’s thrusts soon lost their rhythm as he fought for control, fought for just one more moment inside this handsome, enigmatic man, who saw fit to challenge absolutely everything that Charlie thought he knew about the man. It was just enough time for Matthew to come off beneath him, spilling into Charlie’s soft hand with a strangled gasp and groan, his body tightening beautifully around Charlie’s cock. The sights and the sounds were more than enough for Charlie to climax too, but he struggled to pull out before he did, thinking that Matthew might not take to kindly to him coming inside him, when Matthew reached backward and grasped at his hip, keeping him firmly in place with a whispered, “C’mon, then. Do it. Come inside me, Charlie,” he all but ordered, his tone the only thing keeping the words gentle. With a gasp of his own, Charlie immediately complied, burying his face in Matthew’s shoulder as he reached his peak, his climax filling Matthew and leaving him with a peculiarly satisfied feeling.

They were both practically boneless as Charlie slipped out of Matthew only to spoon back against his back; his hand still pressed against Matthew’s softening cock. After they caught their breath, Matthew reached onto the bedside table and passed Charlie a few tissues, reaching for and cleaning the man’s hand off before tending to himself. He jumped when Charlie made to wipe his arse clean, relaxing only when he realized what it was that the younger man was doing. Taking the used tissues, Matthew carelessly tossed them into the wastebasket before he strained upwards to shut the light off.

Without saying a word about whether or not he expected Charlie to stay or to leave, Matthew turned around completely to face him, pulling the covers up over them both and wrapping an arm around Charlie’s chest, his head settling beside Charlie’s on the pillow. Struggling to just go along with it, Charlie lay there in the dark, reflecting on his good fortune as his hand came up to settle on Matthew’s forearm, trying not to wonder too much about the future in the process. Sensing this, Matthew simply leaned forward to press a kiss against the constable’s cheek, his breath fanning out against his face as they both relaxed into sleep in each other’s arms.


End file.
